Positive impacts

I feel like there’s a debate that often comes up, a lot in movies or elsewhere about whether or not as people and humans we can really change.

Some narratives will say yes people can change, and others say that we never really change from who we are. I guess I’ve never really known whether we do or not, do we fundamentally change or do we adopt habits and work on self improvement, is there a difference.

I was reflecting about my dad on a walk recently (often when I do most of my thinking) and about how he has changed over the years of my life. 

When I was much younger kid, he was a pretty heavy smoker, and drinker, somewhat active. I remember him taking us swimming, teaching us how to ride a bike, we would take the ball to the park to play, or have the occasional sprint, and he would get puffed out easily, or at least that was my memory of it, maybe he was actually letting me win the running races.

Anyway, it didn’t change my opinion of him, being my more than capable dad, able to fix anything and make things. But at some point, I want to say I was about 10, he quit smoking. I’m not sure if there was a health scare there or another reason, but he quit cold turkey, started riding his bike to work and generally being more active, eating more healthily.

The smoking relapsed after about 5 years, but after a second attempt he quit for good. The drinking also got less and less to the point where now he doesn’t really drink at all. He goes to the gym a few times a week, swims a few times a week, and goes for a regular walk.

I guess he has more time too, but similarly he could have stayed on the same path of smoking, drinking and generally being inactive. But he didn’t, he made a change, or at least installed new habits into his life to lead a healthier life. He became a really good cook too, and taught me many home cooked healthy meals to make as I became more interested in it and I suppose it was a way for us to bond.

We’ve never really spoken about it in detail and the opportunities are a bit less these days, but I wonder if any of it was about being a good role model for us kids. Perhaps, perhaps not, doesn’t really matter, the impact was the same regardless, I saw my dad, who would always be a hero in my eyes, go from the guy who could fix anything to even more capable than that.

I saw someone who was willing to make that positive change in their own life to lead a better life as they started to get older, and I can’t fault that. He always supported me to follow my dreams and interests, from music to fitness and whatever in between.

I guess we don’t always know what impact we’re going to be having on those around us from our family to our friends and our kids, but I guess if we’re always working on trying to be our best, that’s having some real good positive knock on impact somewhere.

Anyway, I’m not sure if this is really help or not, but I guess if you’re out there, doing your best for you, waking up to that early alarm, getting to the gym after work even though you’re dog tired, aiming to get a few extra steps in, it’s having a positive outward effect on the world and those around you, whether it’s your partner, kids, parents. 

Whether that is realised now, or in 40 years time doesn’t really matter, If you’re trying to do your own best, then you’re already smashing it. It’s not about being perfect, its about the actions that have such an amazing ripple effect.

Keep it up legends!

Lawrence x